Good Friday morning! Not yet 5 am but I have been up since 2:30 AM. I got some pretty disturbing news last night. A very dear friend that I have know since I was in the drug recovery half way house years ago has just been busted for drugs. I am shocked and more then alittle surprised. I kind of knew she had a pill problem, but I truly had no idea about all this other stuff. A cop called me from her number to ask me to go pick up her kids from school yesterday afternoon. I don't have a car and couldn't help her. They released her, but they will be back. They will put out a warrant in a few months. The same thing happened to me. YEARS AGO!
People this is not something that I am proud of. Most of my readers know that I was an active drug addict (drug of choice was meth) for most of my adult life. Today I am a recovering addict. An ADDICT. I can use anything to try to make me feel different. Food, spending, ect. Food is now my drug of choice. I am in recovery from food everyday, the same as the drugs.
This hits so close to home for me. I remember what it feels like to be locked up. To feel that incomprehensible demoralization I am so grateful that I do not have live like that anymore. She seems upbeat. Really?? Denial is not just a river in Egypt. This woman has a very good job, a wonderful family, money. Everything that should make life enjoyable. Addiction is such crazy ass disease. It is a disease that tells you that you aren't sick. She refuses to tell her family, who would support her and help her. PRIDE! UGH! That is a disease too. The WORST of all spiritual maladies.
Today I am just going to try to stay objective and not get sucked into her craziness. I want to help, but I refuse to blow smoke up her ass either. Oh and I am going to hit my knees and thank my Heavenly Father for my soberiety, then hit a meeting to tell others. That's how it works, folks.
Best get dress.......it's walking time!
Keep the mood and food real.............be honest with yourself!