Sunday, July 18, 2010

Our True Identity

Yesterday didn't turn out like I thought it would. One of the Ggirls had the runs. So swimming was out. I did have a good time. I kind of felt exhausted. They are only 3 and I forget there is 2 of them. Only one of me. I ate too much. Those little girls are relentless. They want to be eating 24/7. So I gave in. It sucked being cooped up in this house. UGH! Then had the kids bring dinner to me when they came to get the girls. Nothing terrible. Still. Too salty. I am feeling the extra weight now. I didn't walk yesterday morning either. In fact I didn't get dressed all day. I was never a stay at home mom. Much a job for me. Hardest job EVER. That's why God decided a woman should do it. I can see why you would never make it out of your jammies. Anyway, I was exhausted and went to bed early. Very early. Woke up in the middle of the night. Ate. This is not good news. Nope, not at all.

Why am I doing this now. I don't want to backslide. There really is no standing still your either going on way or the other. I have been able to mange the little back and forths with my weight' Till this past month. I am going to be 50 in a few weeks. FIFTY! I truly never thought I would see 50. Both my parent died before the age of 60 and the way I abused my body, well hell, I didn't think I was going to need a retirement plan.

For the past few months I have been bragging how I have never felt better. That is true. I have never felt stronger or more capable of what I can do. In all areas of my life. I think age, sober living, and a sense of who I am is has been the key for me. I have come to realize that it's really all about my intentions. I was reading Roxie's "reverence" post. When her intentions changed her world changed. Even about something as simple (or hard, in my case..lol) as food prep. When I came to know for myself who I was I began to realize that I CAN DO HARD THINGS. So what has changed. My perspective. I have let myself forget who I really am. That I am worth all the hard work. Here's another short video that inspired me this morning. We all need to remember Our True Identity. It still amazes me that my prayers are answered in such a personal and profound way. I really needed to be remind of this.

Have a great Sunday. Let's treat ourselves with loving kindness. For me that means getting off the computer and getting out the door for a walk.

Keep the mood and the food real.

10 comments:

  1. Why are you doing this now? I don't know. I ask myself the same question. Perhaps rather than look at this as some sort of setback, we could choose to view this recognition as merely an opportunity to change our actions just a bit. I think you've got it right with the lovingkindness bit - we haven't been bad, we've been human.

    I hope you enjoyed your walk.

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  2. Hey, yeah!
    It's birthday time around here -
    Summer is nearly, almost, somewhat, kind of,
    nearing the end.
    Autumn is just around the proverbial corner.

    Time to get this season's ducks in a row!

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  3. The journey just isn't linear. It's up, down, forward, back, in and out. I'm not doing what I want to do either, and with my birthday coming up later this week (got a few years on you, Dana!) I'm not thinking I'm quite ready to reel it back in. But I'm striving for some moderation from my old "unreeled" status of no holds barred eating because I'm not following my plan to the letter. Black and white thinking avails me nothing, and I think I've just come upon a topic for today's post.

    50 is great, Dana. By the time the day actually arrived, I'd pondered it and obsessed about it so long (since the 49th b'day!) that it was a non-event, at least in my emotional landscape. It came to me that I really didn't have to take crap off anyone anymore. Funny how that thought made me feel good then, but I still take plenty of crap 7 years later!

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  4. I find my mojo is like the waves, up and down! Just never give up.

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  5. I agree with your definition of kindness towards ourselves.

    I think we all have our moments, in both directions, like a pendulum.

    Thanks for checking in on me!

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  6. Isn't it interesting how we all seem to re-evaluate our lives as birthdays approach? Loving your self-awareness, my friend!

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  7. and the BEING WORTH THE HARD WORK is one which I needed to hear this morning too!
    a reminder.
    for me, today, not in the fitness world but its all the same isnt it?

    we need to remember we are worth it!!

    Miz.

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  8. You are here...you've recognized that there was a shift in your thoughts and feelings. AND you have admitted that you lost control yesterday due to the strain of life.

    Soooooooooooo......get back in the saddle!

    I think you hit it on the head when you said that you have to recognize and learn who you are...your sense of self to really make progress on this journey! Once you do...like you said, we realize that we really are worth the effort.

    You rock!

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  9. It's all about the ups and downs, as long as we recognize it and reel it in when we need to, it's all good!

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