WOW! The week has flown by. I can't believe it's already Thursday. Work has been crazy. I have been lazy. I am worn out when I get home. I haven't really been wanting to blog this week. Doing alittle less time on the computer and more time engaged in real life. Which is a good thing. Food has been good. Not eating out. Fruits and veggies and protein. The good stuff. Went to book club Tuesday night and said no to the sweet roll. Got on the scales the next morning and gained 2 lbs. The body, she is fickle....no? Made me laugh. Weighing ever day has been good and as long as I can keep this kind of attitude I am going to keep it up. I am overall feeling more peaceful.
Walking as always. Getting ready to watch good old Brenda Lee Johnson solve another murder. I woke up late this morning and opted out of an outdoor walk. So the treadclimber is happening as soon as I sign off. Trying to push myself alittle harder.
Have been thinking alot about my body image lately. When my intention shifted from eating healthy and feeling better to about the number or the size I started to lose focus. Why would that be. Everyone wants to look good. That's not a bad thing. But it is true, when I started going out and buying new clothes and was forced to look at all new sizes ( some I could wear, some I couldn't ) and look at myself critically in the mirror things started changed. It was subtle, hardly noticeable at first, but changed none the less. Do I not feel worthy of be thinner or a certain weight? I don't know. I know in my head that I am, but do I feel it in my heart.
Forgiving one's self is a tricky business. Much harder then forgiving some one else. At least I think so. I am so much better then I used to be. No where near where I want to be. I know that today I am a work in progress. Sometimes progress is slow, most times progress is slow. Today I feel like I am pressing forward. Fighting a good fight.........for me.
Hope everyone is having a great Thursday......keep the mood and the food real