Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Riding my butt off.....literally!

I can't believe it's Wed and I haven't posted since Friday. Been reading your blogs, but not commenting much. I have felt kind of like I'm in limbo. I am still traveling about 15-20 miles a day in the bike going back and forth to my job. My therapist told me he thought I looked good today. Happier, calmer, healthier. I would have paid just to hear that alone. Forget about the other 50 minutes.....lol. I feel calmer. I just wish I could just focus better. My mind seems to be all over the place. Plus I can't remember shit. Seriously. If I call someone and it takes longer then 3 rings for them to answer the phone I forget who I've called. I know alot of this is because there is still alot going on. A lot I am not certain about. A lot of living by faith.

The Boss responded to my letter and we agreed on back vacation pay. Nothing like what he owed me, but I really didn't have a legal leg to stand on with that anyway. It should be enough to buy a little car. A CAR! I am so nervous about the thought of it. Like getting excited might jinx it. It was just a verbal agreement, so I will believe it when I see it. He told me he would have a check for me by the end of the week. That's what really makes me nervous, I'm afraid he won't follow through. Nothing I can do about that. Worry will not make it happen, so I need to stop worrying. I just really want to put this behind me. I want to be done with them for good. He didn't even apologize for the way things went down. That is something I need to let go of as well. I have a plan if he doesn't hold up his end of deal. So I will proceed that way.

Went downtown for a Trustee meeting and found out that my case had been dismissed. WTF?? I guess I mailed paper work to the wrong place. Oops. It's easily fixable. I will have to get back downtown though (no small endeavor without a car ). It just makes the process longer. UGH!

My weight has been down. All the bike riding. Plus I am still walking in the mornings as well. Not eating anything crazy, but not being strict either. Maintaining. Feeling good about what I eat and the way I eating it. No binging. No food comas. I wonder if things will ever settle down so I can focus on loosing again. Many kind people have been feeding me. I can't freak out because I am not eating meals prepared by me. Or that aren't as healthy as I would like them to me. The price is right (free), and I am trying to save every little penny. I know that I am doing the best I can for my situation.

Making sure to weed out discouragement and fear. They are both poison to me. Staying positive. This is going to be my year! I can feel it.

Keep the mood and the food real.......

190.3

5 comments:

  1. Dana - what progress! I mean, I understand that you are in a really tough spot but look at how you are handling it! Seriously awesome. You are getting good exercise, eating appropriately, standing up for yourself!!!!! and making the absolute best of a difficult situation. A little distracted is to be expected, girl. Please don't be discouraged - look at what you are doing and what is happening for you!

    I could go on and on. I'll look forward to having the guy come through with the money this week and that a car is in your future - along with many other good things.

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  2. You are doing great I think with all that's been going on. Glad the old boss said he'd give you some back pay I will say a prayer he puts the check in the mail. I'm so excited about you being able to get a car too. I do think this is going to be your year. *hugs my friend*

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  3. Great job with the boss! I'm so glad that you did it. Even more impressive is what the therapist told you. Hooray! You really are garnering your year. Take it baby.

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  4. Crossing my fingers that your boss really comes through and you end up being able to get a car - yay! Love that you are seeing such great results from all of the bike riding, though...shows what a strong person you are!

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  5. sending you positive thoughts
    and me
    and you :)
    to keep that FEELING OF FEAR at bay.

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