Well, I am just so discouraged. Neither place called me back. You think they would be professional enough to let a person know. I can't figure it out. I really thought I put my best foot forward. I went out to my daughter's last night and got in a huge fight with her. That rarely happens and I am just sick about it. I acted like a fool and left in a huff. I am stressed out. I cry all the time and I feel exhausted. I have a doctor appointment on Friday that I can't afford. I am afraid that they are going to add diabetes to the list of stuff wrong. I probably need to get some counseling. Is this a reasonable reaction to all the stress? I don't know any more. This is not where I wanted to be at age 52. I have gained back 20 lbs. I feel and look fat. People do double takes that haven't seen me in a while.
I know that I am the only one that can change my outlook and the defeating attitude. I just feel helpless. I am tired of feeling that way. It doesn't feel good at all. I wish that life were easier. In truth, life isn't so bad. I am just stuck. I dream about being stuck ALL THE TIME. At least 3 times a week I dream that I can't move or that I am so slow that I never get anywhere. Had one last night.
I will get back on the job websites and try, try again. I wonder if my all out sweat fest was alarming to the home care place? Who wants to hire a old, sweating woman, when there are plenty of young, pretty, dry women out there that need a job. Like I said, discouraged. I am really sucked into it right now. I am hoping this is temporary. I really have to continue to believe that there are good things to come.
Keep the mood and the food real...............